Last year I rang in New Years at the hospital with an MRI and an amazing friend in the waiting room, and boy was that an interesting way to celebrate. Over this year I’ve learned a lot. I spent the first half of the year trying to figure out what was missing from my life, and I can’t say I’ll ever really know, but what’s the fun in that?
I had a few unexpected people walk into my life, and turn around and walk right back out. I watched as Gus has transformed from a puppy to a well behaved dog, held my best friends baby, paid for a strangers coffee, saw the head and the heart live, had a dance party in my kitchen, stood next to my Brother as he said “I Do”, played a trivia game on a Podcast, tripped and fell over 6 times, made brunch for two, kissed someone in the pouring rain, sent gifts to friends in other countries for no reason, spent the day in the emergency room by myself, won two Instagram contests, pulled all nighters, graduated two of my athletes who have changed my life more than they will know, been escorted through the airport in a wheel chair with crutches in-tow, skillfully snagged 4 amazing tickets to Adele, played tag with my dog around my house, spent my 30th dancing on stage to “Pony”… again, took Gus with me on sleepovers, found out over the past 11 years my arthritis treatment and chemo therapy has caused major damage to my liver, taken numerous road trips to Southern California, spent an unforgettable weekend in San Francisco with my dad, went to the Super Bowl and met Reggie Bush, Bobby Wagner and Calias Campbell, almost drowned in Lake Oswego, drove the long way home just to listen to music longer, bought myself fresh flowers weekly to brighten up my home, held Sam Hunts hand while I was front row at his concert, celebrated the wedding of two high school friends and recreated a photo from our 6th grade basketball team, took 17 high school girls on a bonding trip, watched the sunset on the beach, took Gus swimming in a pool with 100 other dogs, sent flowers to friends for their 30th’s, went ice skating… well kinda, received a Happy Mother’s Day text from one of my volleyball players, was a foreman on a Jury and presented a verdict, been let down by people closest to me, got a call that one of my athletes got a scholarship to play volleyball (so damn proud), sailed around the Sound and got stranded when the boat broke down, played in the snow with Gus, and tasted more wines than I can count.
This year I learned that things don’t always turn out the way you planned, or the way you think they should. I’ve learned you’re going to make some poor life decisions and it matters what friends you call to talk you through it without judgement. I’ve learned you can’t force someone to love you, but you can hold on to those that do. I’ve learned that relationships are hard. I’ve learned that dogs know more about what we need than we actually do. I’ve learned that there are things that go wrong that don’t always get fixed or get put back together the way they were before. I’ve learned that some broken things stay broken, actions speak louder than words, and some things that have been said or done can be forgiven, but never be forgotten. I’ve learned that on one hand, expectations can inspire you, but then again, they can really let you down, and I’ve learned that “thank you” goes a long way.
This year I promise to: think before I speak, be kind to those around me, be more open minded, stand up for myself, say “no” more, say “yes” more, I will not judge others for having a different opinion than me, I will try to swear less, and I will give back to the community that built me into the woman I am by teaching my athletes that hard work is what gets you what you want in this world. I promise to save more dogs from being trapped in hot cars, spend way too much money on coffee, clothes and fresh flowers. I will be more spontaneous, I will learn what my limits are with my body, I will continue to put those closest to me first, because that is what matters to ME. I will say “I love you” more, I will be in the moment as often as possible, I will be with my friends during important moments in their lives, and I will be okay with letting go of people who don’t treat me with respect and kindness.
I’ve learned that life is kind of like a party. You invite a lot of people, some leave early, some stay all night, some laugh with you, some laugh at you, and some show up late. But in the end, after the fun, there are a few who stay to help you clean up the mess. And most of the time they aren’t event the ones who made the mess. These are the people that matter the most.
Cheers to another year on this crazy roller coaster.